chic talk In Our Opinion Relationships & Dating

Hook Ups and Screw Ups

By: McKenna Leavens

In the past week, it’s been brought to my attention that some aren’t aware of what the term “hook up” means or have various definitions of the word hookup.

It goes from making out to sleeping with someone, and the translation of the hookup has become lost. According to The Chic Daily’s poll, 58% of our followers have participated in hook up culture. 

Let me break it down for you; according to Google, Hook up culture is essentially a one night stand. It’s about being with someone while having no emotional connection — just physical. While this is one specific definition, I have another in mind. 

Personally, I think hook up culture is every guy’s dream and every girl’s nightmare.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure there are some girls who don’t mind it and maybe even enjoy it but, female emotions typically play a major role in everything we do. 

Here’s the thing, women want to be respected, and we often hear men talk about how they want a woman who they can respect. So, how are we supposed to reach this goal if we just hook up on the first date or first night of meeting? 

Girl, I promise you he is not going to text you the next day, he got what he wanted without even working for it. I get it. It’s hard to not just go for it when you are really attracted to someone.

On the other hand, what’s the issue with waiting for the third or fourth date? Make him WORK for it. If he’s a good, respectable guy, he will wait and if he’s not, then why even waste your time?  

First impressions set the tone for the entire relationship. If you sleep with him then that’s what he’s going to expect every single time.

Set the expectations yourself, show him your personality. I promise you, you have your whole life to show him everything else.  

I don’t necessarily disagree with hook up culture, but I personally don’t see any benefits to it. I have watched my friends participate in it and it always seems to get messy and confusing in the end.  

This has become such a normal thing in today’s society and I feel like it has made more drama and confusion.

More often than not, I’ve noticed the person always has hook up regret.

One of my friends met a guy on Tinder and they had been texting for a while. They finally agreed to meet and ended hooking up that night, and after his personality totally flipped.

Prior to them meeting, he was texting her every day, asking her questions about herself, and seemed genuinely interested. Then, after the fact, he would maybe text her twice a week, but usually only to ask if they wanted to hang out again — just to hook up.

My friend was okay with this at first. She kept telling me, “I don’t want anything serious anyway.”

However, as females we tend to catch feelings and start to care about a guy. But normally, the guy doesn’t care back. So my friend’s “hook up” ended on bad terms and she swore off Tinder.  

Dating apps like Tinder, Grinder, and Bumble are essentially what started hook up culture in the first place.

There is an over saturation of opportunities that lead to one night stands to “try out” all of your different matches.

It’s almost TOO easy to find a match, that people don’t take the time to get to know each other, they automatically assume that you’re on this app for a hook up.

What happened to meeting people in public and having to talk and get to know them? These apps have taken over the dating world and changed it for the worse. 

My point is physical connection usually turns into an emotional one and living within hook up culture can be extremely difficult when you’re actually looking for something real.

If hooking up is working for you and you’re more than happy with it, then, by all means continue what you’re doing. But be wary — sleeping with someone new each week can get old and become disappointing. 

Do yourself a favor and start playing hard to get, make these boys work for you. You deserve reciprocated feelings and to feel valued. See how you get treated differently once you START treating yourself differently…. it’s worth it!


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