By: McKenna Leavens
There’s nothing quite like being called crazy — especially as a female. A word some men have become so comfortable saying.
“Stop being crazy!” This phrase makes my head explode.
This perception of women has created a double standard, in my opinion.
Picture this: A guy is begging for a girl to take him back. He is confessing his love by showing up at her house. He says he will do anything and will fight for her. This scenario is usually considered romantic and sweet.
But, if a girl were to do something similar, it is automatically considered “possessive and psychotic.”
If a guy were to leave a girl on read for days on end, and she were to text him to check in and see if he’s okay, it’s considered overbearing.
I sometimes wonder if men ever consider that maybe making a girl feel special one day then completely ignore her the next ultimately making her feel like a stranger is crazy?
Some men are quick to assume that when a girl cares, she is already hears wedding bells. But then men will complain when they get a girl who doesn’t emote or give them the time of day — and women are the crazy ones, right?
During my sophomore year of high school, I dated this guy who constantly painted me out to be the bad guy. For days, he wouldn’t answer me whenever I would call or text. Yet I was considered “crazy” because I was upset about being ignored. Whenever I would try and bring this up he would flip it around, saying “he was busy” or “I was bothering him.” Because I was not compliant to his time, I was considered crazy. I bet a lot of women out there can relate to this situation.
Not too long ago something similar happened to me. I started talking to this guy who I thought was understanding and suddenly, a switch flipped.
I opened up about some personal things and felt comfortable confiding in him. The moment I let my guard down, he decided to use my insecurities against me. I chose to let him in, and he chose to call me “crazy” because of it.
On social media, you’ll see the occasional post where a guy is ranting about how this “psycho girl” won’t leave him alone. And don’t forget about the classic “crazy ex” who won’t get over him. When women open up and are vulnerable, sometimes it feels like there is an automatic assumption of us being “insane.”
“Truth Hurts” by Lizzo is a perfect example of this issue. When she sings “why men great til they gotta be great?,” really speaks to the topic of women being called crazy.
Men tend to come off understanding and empathetic at the beginning of a relationship but when women are the slightest bit emotional, they run. Like Lizzo said, the truth hurts. This is the truth and an issue that needs to be talked about.
If you are a guy and feel like your girl is being over the top, ask yourself “how can we fix this?” Maybe there is something you did to cause her feel this way.
Even if her answer is no, still have a conversation about how she’s feeling and what is going on in your relationship.
Do not automatically assume she is crazy and label her as such. Look at how you’re treating her before you complain about her reactions. There is always a deeper meaning.
As a girl, I hate being called crazy, it’s demeaning and makes me feel like me caring about a guy isn’t even worth it. I’m trying to not give up completely on the male population but man, some guys make it hard.
A little secret to all the women out there, the ones who call you crazy are usually the craziest of them all. Some men tend to project their insecure feelings onto their significant other. If this is the case of your relationship, consider some lifestyle changes, maybe go solo?
Embrace who you are, because aren’t we all a little crazy?
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